Don't Be Afraid To Get Paid!

I recently attended my friend/neighbor's "Gab and Dab" event at her newly-opened children's art studio. It included open access to her adorable studio for the parents to chit chat while they let the kids dive into the art goodies. I was so impressed- amazing projects on display by current students of her structured curriculum, a treasure trove of art supplies organized through colorful bins and shelves, great music by which to create, colorful kid-sized furniture... everything except... wawh wawh (trombone sound) this empty tissue box near the back sink that said, "$20. Thank You." That was how she was charging for this fabulous event? We were supposed to shove our $20 fee into this tissue box? She was presenting herself as a step up from panhandling.

A few days after the event over a push-trike walk with our girls, I raved to my friend about her studio and the fun my daughter and I had at Gab and Dab (and how I loved that she got to explore the world of glitter without being in my house). I couldn't resist teasing her about her fancy 'cash register' though and she admitted that her event revenue was (not surprisingly) slim. She further confessed that she HATES dealing with the money--she almost invited her husband just to collect it! As an added complexity, she's friendly with all the parents now and isn't comfortable charging people she 'knows' (she actually offered for my daughter to be a freebie and I vehemently declined!!)

There I was about to dole out the "Just do it- ask for the money!" advice when I recalled that I had a similar problem myself in my freelancing days. I could have made a lot more money than I did but I actually felt uncomfortable charging for my services- especially when my work came so easily to me and I liked my clients so much!! Why did I undervalue myself like that? After all, they had hired me and they fully expected to pay.

fwm contributor Joni Daniels, creator of Power Tools for Women (DEFINITELY check out her work when you have a chance--she's amazing), recently gave this advice to the Yahoo! Seeds For Success contestants. It really rings true for my friend and I suspect, many women business owners:

Stop being flattered when asked to do business. You have every right to be in the game, play the game, and win!

Do you get sheepish when it comes to money matters? Did you find a way to overcome it? Are you a freelancer or entrepreneur who's plagued by or recovered from treating too many clients and customers to your "friends-and-family" prices?

Surviving Launch Anxiety

A few years ago I read that the latest savvy business trend was to "go green" and I immediately came up with the idea of creating eco-friendly, reusable grocery bags. After Googling my idea I found that other people were already banking on it, but I also discovered that the bags that existed were expensive and not accessible to every market. So I did some more research, drafted a business plan, and started calling suppliers to figure out how I could provide a similar product for less. My plan was to create colorful polypropylene bags with large white figures that would serve as canvasses for children to decorate. Parents everywhere would display their kids’ creations while saving the planet and there would also be an interactive website to teach children about the environment.

But I never went through with my idea because I experienced launch anxiety. You know the feeling: that something will go wrong and everyone will know. I was paralyzed with what ifs. It seemed like everyone I told my idea to would either laugh or question the need for such a product. At the time, I thought my decisions needed a seal of approval from everyone else. I was afraid of the embarrassment that I would feel if things didn’t go according to plan and they asked, “What ever happened to that bag business you were planning?” I always knew my idea was a great one, but I made the big mistake of thinking that everyone had to agree. If I planned on doing it all by myself, why did I care so much what everyone thought? I was afraid of failing and being stuck at square one again for everyone to see.

These days I want to be a writer and that launch anxiety is slowly creeping up on me again. With college graduation quickly approaching I have to make career decisions pretty soon. I know I have plenty of choices like freelancing, editorial work, or writing for public relations; but I always have that gut feeling telling me to proceed with caution. Every time I want to sit down and write clips I wonder: can I really make a living as a writer? What experience do I have that might encourage anyone to care about what I have to say?

I still don’t know the answers to these and many questions, but I know that every day I wake up and I want to write about something. This is my calling. So I’ve decided to just listen and take small steps everyday. My mentor says that fear is a good thing and anyone who has ever achieved great success has gone through what I’m feeling. I know she’s right so I’m going to try to ignore my anxiety as much as possible and take small steps for my career every day.

Have you ever experienced launch anxiety? What helped you cope with the feeling? I’d love to hear about how being nervous or afraid of the unknown affected your career path and helped you keep going.