I agree with you completely. A potential discussion direction is to go deeper into your statement, "I have talents and a purpose as a mother, a wife, an employee, a friend, a daughter, a sister, an aunt" and link it to your following statement, "...finding my gifts and reason for being in each of those roles..." and say that the "gifts" you are looking for are the very originator of the "reason" why you find yourself in particular "roles". You will find that what looks like diverse roles you play are a constellation of ways you express your natural talents. It takes a tremendous investment in introspection and time being with one's "True Self" in order for a person to begin rediscovering and remembering these gifts. Eventually, you may find that your perception about your talents and gifts begins to shift from one of "self" (this "self" more an "ego self" than your "Authentic Self") to "service". I wrote about my own perception shift here: http://whatilovetodo.com/?p=33

Yes, that is very true. As a matter of fact, it is so true that sometimes you don't even have the words to express it. I know I have a purpose in my life and many talents and writing is on of them. I can feel it and it is soon to come to pass. It seem as if no one understand where I'm coming from. If I could only have the chance and the resources that I needed, I know I could accomplish my dream.

My being a great Mother, daughter , wife, freind, etc. is only helping me feed the fire deep within me. I remember watching the Jackson five and Micheal Jackson had said that he was full of music and he want to release it. Micheal knew what he had and didn't really know how to get it out of him, well that is exactly where I'm at. Some people just don't have the resources, money, and other things that will help to boost your desire. It's hard to explain when you all you have is a passion for what you belive in. My children are my inspiration. All things happen for a reason and without them, I wouldn't be all that I am now. People like me who are building from the bottom isn't going to be respected for none of your ideas or goals. You have to believe in yourself and keep on going. Being misunderstood and rejected only help me not crush me. To everyone who feel where I'm coming from, hold on because change is coming and keep your head held high!

Renata, this really spoke to me. Thank you for writing it. I love my life and I'm very happy with the way it is working out (despite some turns in the road), but like everyone I have learned that a lot of adult tasks, be they career or family-oriented are all about the "have-to" tasks. As in, I have to do this or that whether I want to or not. As a child, adulthood always seemed to be about doing whatever you wanted! The have-to's all have one thing in common: they tend to be THANKLESS jobs and that is when it is important to remember your overall purpose. Picking up the remnants of a McDonalds Happy meal consumed in the back seat of my car may be no one's idea of fun, but treating my kids to something they have been promised and have looked forward to all week is definitely part of my purpose!

I just read something (now if I could only remember where I would post it here for you to read!!) about morale in the workplace that has a lot to do with what Renata is saying here. Apparently, and this makes complete sense to me, the secret to keeping high morale among employees who are responsible for mundane tasks is to continually remind and show them how important their tasks are to the overall purpose of the organization. Since high morale leads to high productivity, many large companies are beginning to quantify the effects of keeping all levels of the organization focused on the big-picture purpose.

Wow! Someone finally wrote about what I've been feeling! I love my career - don't get me wrong, but life is not only career. And I guess that I'm really only happy in my career if I feel like I'm doing something that is making a difference PLUS finding time for the other things that matter to me. I love the name "finding what matters". After all - that is what both my career and my life should be focused on. Purpose!

I couldn't agree more, Renata. And I think that life, with all its twists and turns, continually gives us new purpose -- and opens the door for us to use our talents in meaningful ways for real impact. We've all seen it happen in so many ways. Maybe it is a woman touched by cancer who starts a nonprofit. Perhaps it is someone who writes a book or starts a business (like Carolyn & Co!) meant to inform, connect and help people in the ways they need it most. It doesn't matter -- in any case, we're talking about combining individual life experiences with unique talents to change people's lives. So the next time our lives take an unexpected turn -- big or small, good or bad -- perhaps we should look very closely not only at how the twist of fate has changed our own lives... but how we might be able to take the experience, apply our talents and change the lives of others. New purpose!

Well said everyone! I come from an amazingly talented family, it took me until my early forties to find mine! I am a good mom, but my children are adults now and I can focus on expanding my knowledge for my business. I discovered I can make well crafted jewelry, while selling at the local market I saw the need for food to be sold, so I branched of into that as well. I discovered I plan excellent menus. I also recently became an events planner for the winter market which I helped form. Whew! I never knew I could do all that! It happened because I mustered the courage to break free from what is considered a normal career. While I don't make gobs of money, it feeds my need to create and be around people. For those trying to start something with little to no money, I did it, so can you! You have to think beyond what we are told,which is the current way of achieving success. Dig deep, you will find it!

I agree with you. Each person has different talents and gifts. It is up to us to use our gifts to the best of our abilities. For example, some people have the gift of organization and they can mult-tasking with ease while others do not. It would be frustrating to have the gifted multi-tasker do one task at a time and vice versa. We have to find out what works for us as an individual and do our best. We should not worry about what the world says or be confined to the world standards. If we set our eyes on our purpose, we will always win the race that was set out for us before we were born.

I totally agree! While each person has different talents and gifts, I think it is important for us not to forget that it takes teamwork to accomplish a task or a project. There is not one person that is an expert at everything. Therefore, we should not become jealous of another person's talents or gifts, we are all individuals searching our purpose in life. (I think while there are talents and gifts we naturally receive, just fall into, as we are in the workplace or world we also find new talents and gifts that work to our good.... just my thought.) What matter's, encouraging others to continue on their path to search for their talents and gifts. Nothing matter's compared to uplifting someone else. (The most important part of my day... which nothing can ever compare to being a mom, a wife, a friend, or an employee, etc.)

At the market I work with an extraordinary group of crafts people. When I planned events and gave them opportunities to explore new ideas they blew me away with their creativity, they rose to every challenge that I presented and it was incredibly fun! Renata is correct, there must be a purpose for what we decide to do, mine is to help not only myself, but the vendors and the community we serve. A purpose drive life is a life worth living. Women tend to look beyond themselves and work good toward all, even when it is not appreciated or rewarded. I truly believe if there is a will there is a way. We have the ability and intelligence to make our lives better, never let anyone tell you otherwise!

I went to college for Industrial Design of product design. My first job (and still current job) out of school was for a small toy company managing licensed toy developments. During my first year I did corrections for toys and all the art parts of the job that I went to school for when my boss approached me about taking on more of a management role. I pushed back and insisted on doing an art job but he saw my talent was in management and organization. He continued to push me into a mgt role and I eventually went down that road. Now I’m a director of the creative department and I manage R&D offices in Vietnam and Hong Kong. It was a difficult leap for me because I was so determined to make it as an artist and toy designer but I find that now I enjoy the management role tremendously.

I'm loving what everyone is saying. I do believe that your life will carve your destiny. just like Rachel was going one direction, her destiny choose another without her even knowing it! Yes life is full of ups and downs, but it's only teaching us how to survive and to do something that is out of our comfort zone. If we were always comfortable, how on earth would we ever learn? How would we know what we were really good at? Changing environments, fear, too shy, whatever the deal is, we have to push past it and realize this is my life and I'm going to take back my control over it. That is one thing we do have control over and we can always correct a wrong. It will always be up to you! No matter what choice you have to make. Even if it does put you in a mixture of emotions. Let's stop second guessing ourselves and just do it!

Purpose – now that is a word that holds many meanings to me as a woman, mom, wife, daughter, etc. Sometimes my purpose is so clear and at other times so elusive. My friend and I would often discuss “our purpose” in life when we were on the playground with our kids – were we doing what we were meant to do in life and how do you know when you get there? Do you ever get there? Or are you always a work in progress? What I have learned in the last two years is go with what you know, do what you enjoy most and make a difference in your world (no matter how big or small that world may be). My friend and I did just that. We created (www.OurHopePlace.com) a website for friends to help friends cope, hope and heal after miscarriage. Both of us had suffered miscarriages before the birth of our first child. We came up with the idea of Our Hope Place because we both understood the devastation of having a miscarriage and wanted to help the women who came after us. Right now that is my purpose!

Rachel, you said that you enjoy the management role tremendously. Do you LOVE it? You were determined to make it as an artist and toy designer. Did you LOVE being creative "in the first person" (meaning, you did the creating, not managing the creative people)? I'm asking because it is entirely possible that others can see some strengths in us that we may not immediately recognize. We can have many strengths, but we have very specific and unique "love's" that manifest as talents and when put into the physical context, "purpose".

Laura, we don't necessarily need to choose between the options: we can know what we want to do with our lives AND remain a work in progress. Perhaps this is why I use the word "purpose" selectively - this word often gives an impression that there is "an" or "main" purpose for each of us in life, when we are much more than that. In my previous comment I talked about purpose as a manifestation of talent in the physical context (i.e. "world"), and given we each have our unique talents, we each have potentially many different purposes that emerge at various points in our lives.

Hi Jane – that’s an interesting question. I do LOVE the “creation part” of making toys and I definitely have a hand in the creative decisions and direction of products designed by leading the US creative team and Asia R&D teams. I’m not doing much of the day to day drawing and computer arts but over time I’ve found a team that is exceptionally talented and I’m proud to lead them. I was recently challenged to switch roles by managing production and give up mgt of creative. My boss suggested it would broaden my scope as a director. My first instinct was NO, my heart and soul is in the creation of toys but I felt it important to find a solution. I offered a plan to transfer logistics mgt of production to our new Hong Kong office. I’m pleased to say he took my suggestion seriously and we are now going through a detailed reorganization.

Rachel, I understand how you feel about working with talented people,they inspire you to offer your best, to reach new levels of creativity. I began to realize my purpose while working closely with the vendors during the Winter Market. While not as exciting as some of the careers mentioned, I feel what I have to do is vital in the economy we now find ourselves in. It's time for less talk and more action. I have already begun planting my literal seeds for success and they are growing! We "get there" in little steps that catch us by surprise when we realize how far we have come. I literarily started with nothing and have developed a loyal customer base. For the moment I have a very small operation, I plan to explode on the summer market scene in a few weeks. I see a huge need that needs to be filled and thankfully I still have the energy to fill it!

Quinisha, Did you see my last post regarding your direction of writing for a magazine? My neighbor was very successful using the style of writing in a magazine he wanted to write for (using his own story) and it was accepted on his first submission in a major publication. One of the best lessons to learn in business or your career (and I understand, I am a creative person, too, but I have a lot of years of experience), don't try to reinvent the wheel. Get in there however you can and once you develop a reputation, you can start calling some shots. Even Picasso drew realistic subjects before launching into his own style and becoming famous. I wish you all the luck in the world - you can do it!